Tag Archives: Happiness

IT’S MY LIVER-VERSARY:

Been separate from booze for over a decade now. Let this be an example to whoever might be fighting to change something about themselves. Over the course of time, my behavior transformed. It was a significant shift in my mind, surroundings & how I carry myself. I never participated in a program (I’m not knocking those – do what is needed for you!) My support came in what I wanted for my future, who I wanted to be and my friends and family have been my rock. I also lean on a couple of things that I constantly carry in my head, which I’ll share…

One – I do not want my future kids to witness what I did as a child. This is not me complaining or placing blame. It was simply removing the one clear constant pain that kept true happiness at bay for me. They say happiness is a state of mind. I say environment contributes to joy. I had never been in the right environment for myself. That had to change.     

Two – The words of my friend Alexa Fitzpatrick, who I have leaned on, trusted, respected & been inspired by throughout my life. Without Alexa’s words and friendship, I could never write these words today. This is me saying I could NOT have done it alone. Early on she said to me “you are an okay guy when you drink, you are a phenomenal guy when you don’t”. I am far from a phenomenal guy. Us entertainers tend to exaggerate just a tad. I’d have gone with extraordinary, remarkable or sensational. Phenomenal seems a bit much 😉 But her words stuck. They have stayed with me in dark times of self-doubt. I’ve repeated them to myself often over the years. I wanted, want & continue to work towards being the person she feels I have the potential to be.

I share this because, if I can change something of this size within my life, YOU can as well! Whatever it might be. YOU CAN MAKE IT HAPPEN! I’m an Irish-American, Navy Veteran, Comedian who does not touch a drop of alcohol. I drank. I drank a lot. Now I don’t. This is not me patting myself on my back or looking for compliments. My journey and struggles continue. I’d be a moron to think I’m any further along then I was on day one. It’s just me putting an example out to the universe as a possibility of being helpful to someone else. A “well if this knucklehead can do that, than I could definitely do (insert life changes here)” 😂 

It takes will to remove the cause of pain, a real look at yourself, focus on your clear goal, a bit of grit, a whole lot of f*ck you and, most importantly, Support! I have been fortunate enough to get it from people who love me. 

I have also had people tell me “you can’t do it!” People who have treated me differently for my choice. The answer there is to use it…love your haters and make them wrong. Because here is the benefit of fighting and staying on the winning side of your battles. It WILL bleed into all other aspects of your life. It WILL bring that distant vision closer. It WILL lead you to your own personal shift.

Damn! Did I just become a straight up Guru? 

On the serious side, over the years I have shared my journey with people who have come to me with their own struggles. I think I’ve helped some and I know I didn’t help others. Take this the same way and know you’ve got a friend in this (trying to be) “phenomenal guy.” 😂  

HOW ORANGE BECAME MY FAVORITE COLOR

Recently I’ve noticed a great deal more anger online. I myself feel angry about many things that are going on in the world, so I decided to share a little something about myself in honor of the holidays and inspired by someone I love and respect.

I had lunch with my sister, wee cute niece, father, aunt and uncle the other day. The same uncle who fought back from the brink of death. Between many great conversations and laughs, my aunt said to me, “your cousin Jack wants to know why you never wear a NY Yankees hat while you are touring.” This question made complete sense to me as a born and raised New Yorker who, like my cousin, has been a Yankees fan since birth. I do wear a ball-cap quite frequently. Rarely on stage because I feel it can block out light on my face and I still have hair…even though it’s grey, it’s still there! On most occasions the second I get off stage the cap goes on, when traveling the cap goes on, and I do have my reasons for the ball-cap I choose.

I wear a few variations of an Orange Syracuse trucker hat. I never went to Syracuse University or lived in Syracuse, NY. All three of my sisters lived there at some point. One of my brother-in-laws got his law degree there and met my sister while she lived there. My other two brother-in-laws grew up there. I have been to countless games, holidays, parades, and festivals in Syracuse. Three of my nieces are being raised there. All four of my nephews, despite being raised in Connecticut, bleed Orange. There is not a member of my family that can get away with a Syracuse-attire-free Christmas. I’ve never shared this part (because I have no judgment for those who drink) but… my very last drink happen to be a pint of Guinness with my brother-in-law and sister after a Syracuse game at Madison Square Garden. We sat in a restaurant eating dinner and having drinks. At one point I looked around at the table and realized I could not be happier. It’s a great realization, to be happy and in the moment. I’m not always. But there was still something I disliked about myself. Then I took a gaze at my pint of Guinness and heard a voice in my head say “this is a fine way to end this part of my life… this will be my last pint.” No announcement, statement, declaration or program. That was 8 or 9 years ago. I don’t think my brother-in-law or sister even know any of this history of my not drinking. But it’s not the city, games, not drinking or school, it’s family. When I see the color orange (Syracuse), I think of my family.

I told my aunt I wear a Syracuse hat because I’m away from my family a great deal. Comedians travel for a living. That’s part of the job and it can get lonely out there. I wear the hat because it makes me feel close to my family when I’m not, think of them from afar, and always keeping them with me. Also orange is the color of optimism. My aunts reply… “Well, that’s actually very nice,” then she laughed.

May your own family provide as much happiness, care, strength and guidance inside of you this holiday season and many more to come.

Much Love, Peej

Gazientip, Turkey